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한국어: 미안해요 华语: 白日做梦 This is a fun little 'pet-project' of a schoolgirl where she goes on to vent her feelings, thoughts and views, write, and babble on about nonesense that goes about her usual life. |
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Friday, October 31, 20084:13 PM
Happy Halloween ![]() You can't tell how angry I am right now since you're only reading this from before a computer screen. But hell, I'm seriously very very angry. I actually made plans. Like last week, and the week before that. But again I had to freakin cancel them all. I haven't even been able to do anything. Whenever I do have something planned I remember I have freakin play rehersals. This and that this and that. Why don't I just take a stupid sleeping bag and sleep on the floor of the school auditorium. I mean, like I've said, I don't even have a big part. It's not even minor. I'm dead freaking person number four. Yeah, very pround aren't you? So there go my plans for Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. And they were actually good plans. And today I was supposed to hang out and go to a football game and then go out for Halloween, but it's my parents anniversary today. So I can't. We're going to a resturant, and I wouldn't mind. But realize that were going to the freakin Chinese Buffet because my dad wants to. I mean seriously. Ruin my fucking plans. ---- TOP OF PAGE
Tuesday, October 28, 20083:10 PM
crushes suck ![]() My last post was really crap, so there is no need to tell me the aforementioned. But really, it was just a random splurge on my personality, but I would expect you to know me better than that. Onto more important things.. Well, really I wouldn't consider this important, I would just like you all know. So this blog goes out to you. I have to comend you on your progress. You lasted much longer than all the others. At first there was that nostalgic feeling. You know, when you start something new you get all excited and riled up. It had been a while since I actually 'liked' someone. I even made all my close friends play the 'game'. You know, the one girls play when they have their friends guess. Of course, you would know nothing about this because after one guesses correctly we never speak of it again. I was pretty content with myself in that little happy bubble place until the voice of reason broke through. A good friend of mine stated how when they thought about you all they could see was this one guy we all used to know. In this instance we'll call him 'Max'. Personally, I don't know a Max, so yeah, you get the point. Max was one of those kids we all went to school with at one point. He was supposedly 'good-looking', good at that one specific sport that he played, and I guess that was all that was there to the boy. I didn't even remember Max exsisted until my friend brought him up. I never saw Max as a good looking, or handsome guy, but I guess I didn't remember him because he didn't stand out. He wasn't that kid everbody flocked over, and adored. Sure there may have been few, but he just didn't make a difference. He didn't stand out. I was scolded over you. The same friend told me that you were just 'one of them' and I had to forget the fact that you were 'cute' because underneath it all, there was nothing left of you. So I guess I should listen to him. He is a very wise fellow. Ever since he said you were a 'max', I couldn't help but think about that statement. And then I just went through that little immature stage where I pick you to pieces and find something wrong with you and stress upon it until I just dont care that you exsist anymore. I know, very immature. So what was I able to notice about you? You're kind of a slob. You have a dazed look all the time that makes me think of a stoner. You must really like red for some reason. And I get that feeling that you're not every intelligent. There are many more things, but I'll stop there so I can keep it vague, and I don't go on a rant. Well, I have stuff to do and places to go.
The Friday Night Boys - I'm Sorry I Stole Yo Gurl ---- TOP OF PAGE
Saturday, October 25, 20086:36 PM
Mr. Brightside I've been seriously way to tired to do anything. Last night I went to bed at 3. And no, not three in the morning, it was three in the afternoon. And I was woken up at nine when my sister came home and started to ring the door like a maniac. So I got up thinking, "Holy shit, who the hell is at my door at five in the morning?!" And when I saw my mother coming from the living room I just receded back into my room. And then I jumped back up, once again thinking, 'Holy shit I need to do my B-day homework." I went on to get my adgena and start it, but then I had to 'eat', and I realized it was only nine thirty and that it was Friday. You must take into consideration that as Vietnamese people we eat dinner very very late at night. I usually eat at ten. As an American person you're probably thinking, "Dude, I'd be starving". But as an asian person I have about five to six meals a day so I don't starve. But on to other topics... I got up today and had to report to work, and the whole time I was there I was just figuring how many hours there were until we closed. It was an uneventul day. But then I started to flip out getting stressed over nothing. Do I have the right to be stressed over this? Yes. WIll I get over it? Yes of course. I need to stop stressing over stupid things, but I'll tell you all about it later. ![]() SO I was supposed to go to a party today, but I had to watch my sisters. I'm not that upset that I couldn't go. I've just been too tired. Tomorrow I'm supposed to have plans to go to the movies with my friends, but then I remembered I had play rehersals, which kinda ruined everything because it's oh so nicely placed in the middle of the day. I don't even know why I'm needed there in the first place. Certainly they could eliminate my character since I'm only a freaking extra, and make it easier for me. I was also planning to go to the JV soccer games since a few of my friends invited me to go Monday night, but again, the Play ruins all my chances of having any sort of a social life. So I'm praying I dont have rehersal, but knowing me, I probably do. So pray for me XD Since I'm bored, I'll give you a list of the tunes I've been jamming to while I wrote this boring update: Kim Leoni - Medicine 3oh!3 - Don't Trust Me C-SIDE - Boyfriend/Girlfriend BoA - Eat You Up Never Shout Never - Big City Dreams Bloc Party -Flux Sugarcult - She is the Blade Baby Alice - Pina Colada Boy Attack Attack! -I Kissed A Girl Sugarcult - She is the Blade Skillet: Whispers in the Dark Shiny Toy Guns - Le Disko Three Days Grace - Home Cobra Starship - This City is at War Cobra Starship -Send my Love to the Dancefloor and I'll See You in Hell Avenged Sevenfold - Afterlife Lol, I didn't listen to them all, midway through the song I'll get bored and I'll change it. XD ---- TOP OF PAGE
Thursday, October 16, 200810:52 PM
I hope this finds you well ![]() Truthfully I must say that I hope this finds you well. I don't know you well now, but for some point in time there was a moment where I felt I knew you. I watched peple walk by uou, ignoring that you existed as you sat in an old folded chair on the side of the busy street. You were quietm and for a moment, i was afraid you were blind. A large old wicker hat that had a fraying brim shielded your dark eyes from view. You were mumbling to yourself as I felt my chest clench. Were you muttering a curse or a prayer? I wanted to ask you but I remained where I stood. Your baggy blothes draped over you, hiding your shape. Layers upon layers. Youre long faded patterened skirt dragged upon teh ground as you paced back and forth, crying your wares of cinammon and spices. For that time I stood there waiting for my father, approximately one hour, you didn't sell one bag. The bin stood tall as you began to shrink back to your seat. The whole time I stood a short distance away from you, it felt like you couldn't see me. You made me seem invisible, like I didn't exsist as you tried to coax a passerby. Watching you caused my stomach to tie itself into a knot. I felt pity, but I could do nothing to help you. I wanted to just hand you all the money that was burning itself to ashes in my pocket, but again, I stood motionless. I waited. My heart picked up when a Hispanic man came up to you and looked at the cinammon, poking and peering, and I truly believed that he would purchase something. But he said nothing the whole time and walked away. My heart sank again for you. But you showed no emotion. Were you used to this? Was I feeling the pain for you? Your dark face became old and weary before my eyes. And then I was called away. Then, I forgot about you. I remembered you just yesterday, when I saw a poor bird dead upon the concrete. No wounds, no blood, just dead. Someone told me it had probably frozen to death. Like I was with you, I was fascinated. I couldn't tear my eyes away. I just looked with pity, praying quietly to myself for it. I watched it motionless trying to think if there was some way I could've prevented it's death. I wonder what went on before I 'met' you that caused you to be on the street that day. Were you in a bind or did you loose your way? I pray you are safe and doing well. Every once in a while I return to that spot to catch a glimpse of you, to try to atone myself by helping you. But everytime I go, I can never find you. I pray that nothing horrid and grim had become of you. At the bottom of my heart I wish that you won the lottery and no longer reside in the streets. But my head knows that that did not happen. I pray that this finds you well... ---- TOP OF PAGE
Thursday, October 9, 20083:33 PM
you suck ![]() So yeah, it's been a little while since I've updated anything, so today I feel as I might as well since the only thing I really should be doing is typing up a History paper that I had a month to do, which is, due tomorrow. I just feel like not doing it at the moment. So, the same is the same. I got contacts on Monday, but I don't see it as much as a big deal. The only thing is that I'm now forced to put some make up on every morning. If I didn't I'd look like the loch ness monster. And plus, my glasses always hid my face. Modeling in is the same. I got scolded for undereating. But I only eat when I'm hungry anyway. We had a workout class and a hair class, and I felt greatly compelled to buy a Bosu ball. If you don't know what it is, it's like a huge exercise ball cut in half with a platform. It's actually quite fun. School's been the same. It's been much more enjoyable recently I have to say. I've found out I'm really good at soccer, and I find this a great surprise. I never thought I was good at it at all, but now, I'm kinda sad that it's coming to an end. Besides, I HATE football. And plus, I find it really fun that the amazing soccer players want me on their team and are scared of me. But then there are those people who I want to punch the shit out of. Well, you know who you are. You're the ones that never shut the fuck up about shit no one cares about, the ones that try to fake punch each other in slo-mo thinking you're from DragonBall Z, and you know, just annoying. Did I tell you that you ruin my day? I just can't deal with you anymore. You're just so, blech. I want to slap some sense into you. I mean, what's with the attitude? Cause it bugs the shit out of me. I just want to get away from it all. I want to take a long long long long long vacation. Or just send you away for a long time to some remote region of the world where polygamists 'honor kill' you or something. Until you grow up, leave me the hell alone. I'd rather get shot. ---- |
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