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한국어: 미안해요 华语: 白日做梦 This is a fun little 'pet-project' of a schoolgirl where she goes on to vent her feelings, thoughts and views, write, and babble on about nonesense that goes about her usual life. |
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Tuesday, September 30, 200810:45 PM
mew mew mew ![]() [The quote above, you would now if I have ever translated a Vietnamese nursery rhyme to you in english. It's about how children don't take the time to was their faces, and end up just rubbing their eyes with their fists like a cat. It's a cute poem, just kinda harsh in the literal english translation] So, today I got my hair cut. Well, my mother somewhat imposed it on me. I believe her exact words were 'God, you look like a trollop/tramp. Your hair is always disheveled and you look like a beast!. Come on, you and I have the same face (structure) and look at me! You can pull this haircut off. You have the face for all hair cuts!'. Note, this was in 'asian' lol. My tiny asian mother has a 'boy' cut. And she thinks I wold look 'absolutley' adorable with it too. The last time I got a short cut, it ended up above my ears and I looked like Nick Carter from teh Backstreet Boys. It was embarassing as hell. My aunt gave me $5 to stop crying since she had been the one to cut my hair. I stopped crying. Duh, $5 is a lot of money when your in the 5th grade. Of course I went to Asia on vacation and forgot all about it until I went back to school next month. Lets just say that my sixth grade yearbook picture isn't my prettiest picture. So today after a thearter meeting, my mom took me back to the salon. Usually I get my hair trimmed every week becauseI like having people run their fingers through my hair. So after a while of picking, I chose my poison. I personally love my hairdresser, she's teh sweetest Russian you'll ever meet. Well, she's not 'russian' exactly. It's just easier to remember since she's from teh Soviet Union [well was] anyway. So the whole time I was nervous that it would come out horrendous. But you know, I have this weird thing where I get so relaxed in teh hairdressing chair, I fall asleep. So I ended up falling asleep for a while, and I woke up while she was blowdrying it. I had a dream where my Blackmoor fish turned into a goldfish and died. I don't know why, but she told me it was cute, but she meant really that it was cute that I dreamt while getting my hair done. So my mother and I compromised, and I didn't get a 'Rihanna' cut. I got a cute little bob with bangs. It maes me look more asian than I usually look. It lookes like this [here] but in black and in a more adorable pixie like fashion. I don't know why, but I'll be freaking out in Gym class tomorrow when I realize I can't tie my hair into cute pigtails. I don't know, I really like it when people run their fingers through my hair. I find it really relaxing for some reason. Well, I guess that's it? ---- TOP OF PAGE
9:48 PM
not you again ![]() It was very clever of you to bring it up during our comedic 'spat'. I have to say my jaw almost fropped when you mentioned that they were my favorite. I was surprised you knew anything about me at all. I mean, you never bothered to even think about anything but yourself. Besides, it was only a tiny mention. Like you, good things don't last. Sometimes I feel like you have some social disorder or something. One moment you're getting alone so well with people, and then the next you're standing there in the corner thinking and what not. I find it quite annoying. Did you know that I hated it whenever you were serious about something or upset? I don't know, I couldn't take seeing you without a smile. All of your other emotions just made me angry. I felt like you owed me for it. It was your job to smile and make me happy; keep me happy. But I forgot to mention that in the job description. But whatever. I almost forgot to tell you that you made me feel that way. No, not happy, upset. You were moody again. We had a discussion in the hallways, and I clearly saw you roll your eyes at me. You probably didn't notice this, but it really really pissed me off. I hated how you did nothing all day and had the nerve to roll your eyes when I was trying. It makes me also angry when you stand there and give me that look. You know the look I'm talking about. It's just so annoying. I just want to slap you hard enough so that you either get a concussion, or come to your senses. It's frustratin when you sit there and do nothing. At least if you have something to say say it. All you ever do when something is going on is just staring off into deep space or drawing some crooked stick figure on a sheet of paper and dubbing it as 'ah-mazin'. You're not that different from the rest of it so stop having your 'all high and mighty' moments. Everybody loves you, but they don't know you the way I know you. You know, even though I 'love' you, your habits peeve me so much. Don't you dare ever roll your eyes at me again. At least I'm not some stupid facade where nothing exsists behind the mask. Either wear a blindfold or take off the mask. Which will you choose? ---- TOP OF PAGE
Monday, September 29, 200810:09 PM
programming ![]() So, I've gotta say that Dancing with the Stars was a big waste of time. I've gotta say I'm suprised everyone doesn't have herpes with Kim Kardasian being there. I mean really, how many men has she well, I don't need to say the rest. Lately there haven't been any good prime time shows on. I like Total Drama Island. What? I don't care if it's a cartoon. I like Gossip Girl. And I'm excited that Make Me a Supermodel and Pushing Daisies is coming back. I also like Ugly Betty, but I never really 'watch' it. Other than that, life has been normal. Well, except for a few things. You know that guy. That one guy that everyone has around them that everyone thinks is 'outrageously HAWT', and you can only help but wonde why the hell everyone thinks of him this way because to you he is not the 'shizz' or remotely goodlooking. Of course I have one of those very beings in my school. He's just one of those superfical jocks, but then I realized 'holy crap' because that tiny thought in my mind registered him as 'goodlooking'. Wow. Lol, I'm probably having one of those hormonal days. And then I had that little thought of 'omg, he's cute' thing again to day. But I don't remember who with. Lol, that means you weren't important enough for me to remember. Sorry number two, better luck tomorrow. There was this girl I used to know. I guess she was nice, not too special, and then during freshman year she came out of her cacoon. But I gotta say she was far from a 'butterfly'. She really turned out to be a whore, sleeping with every guy possible. I find the whole fact of the matter degrading, and I can't really help but thank the Lord that I never bothered associating with her in the first place. Well, all I gotta say is make sure to take that birth control, use a condom, and well.. umm.. Wash your hands afterward? Rofl, seriously, who am I kidding. I shouldn't be wasting my breath on you. You do whatever you want because your decisons have nothing to do with me. ---- TOP OF PAGE
Saturday, September 27, 20083:51 PM
you again? ![]() You're just another one of those superfical girls that I never want to see again. But of course, you walk into my life again in those 'classy' flip flops, and bug eyed sunglasses. You're just another fake. Blonde, and ditzy. But whatever, once you're done, I'll hope to God that I never have to see you anymore. You were never a 'nice' person. And I can tell you the truth that I hated you, and to this day I still holld a small grudge. But whatever. You're nothing but a brainless brat who picked on everyone. I don't care anymore. I'll be somebody and you can keep living in the past. ♥ I wonder what you'd think if you saw me today. I have to say I looked up to you. You were intimidating, but still, I admired you. Would you be upset with me? Or would you be happy with me? I had told you my sister had gotten her hair chemically straightened one day and you gave me a disdainful look saying 'why would she want to do that?'. I was shy so I told you that she needed to because her hair was generally bad. I don't know. I was always very concerned with what you thought about me. So are you proud of me? Or are you upset with me? ---- TOP OF PAGE
3:26 PM
i feel icky ![]() If you guys haven't noticed, I've been under the weather lately. Well, every since Monday I have been feeling something in the back of my throat. It's just this annoyance that won't go away. It's all his fault that I caught this. For the past few mornings that I've awoken, it's horrible. I can't really afford to miss a day of school. Well, not that I be in deep trouble, but I just don't want to miss things that happen in class. It's sophmore year and I can't really afford to get a bad grade. Maybe I just put a lot on my plate. I was in a rush this morning so I look like trash, and walked out of the door with the wrong pair of glasses. Again. I hate the fact that I have to wake up early every single day. And on Sunday of course I have to go to my stupid confirmation classes. Really, I don't think you need to go through two years to finally get confirmed. I believe that all this church wants is money. I mean I should've been confirmed in the coming months, but no, I have to wait another year and do twenty hours of hanging out with old people. Nice, just nice. But once again I had to go to freakin work. Have I told you how much I hate my fucking job? Yes, I probably have, but I want to refresh you on it. I hate this job. The fact that I have to come in everyday next week and for the following weeks because of the fact that our receptionist is going back to school to become a dental assistant. Does it look like I have the time or the patience for this? Do I seriously have to come in when I'm pretty much on the verge of strep throat? But whatever, I'll get over it. I'm outrageously tired today. I just want to fall asleep, but then again, there aren't many places for you to rest your head. Especially in a salon. ---- TOP OF PAGE
Thursday, September 25, 20087:46 PM
own up ![]() Are you afraid of me? You can talk to me in school and in person, but you can't really mutter a word to me through a computer screen? You im me and then chicken out using that stupid excuse all the time. Oh, chores, homework. Are you fucking kidding me? You never do homework. Don't even bother lying to me. I know you much better than that. I know you more than you know yourself. You're so predictable. But you need to face the facts. I don't need to explain to you. You're a big boy now. You should understand without mommy's help. Are you scared because you can't tell what I'm thinking through text? When I met you I thought you were smart. Then I realized you were nothing but a brainless blubbering ball of meat. But then I found out that you were very rational and calculating. So do the math, you're good at it. Besides, you're in Honors, so figure me out. No cheating, the answers aren't in the back of the book this time. ----- You've probably heard this a lot, but I gotta tell ya, you're a dick. Hah, you're nothing but a brainless tool that needs to get his own personality. You can't treat people like shit like that. Besides, in Psych that means that you were emotionally abused as a child. Emotionally abused? Fuck that. Probably physically too. I mean look at your face. It looks like it was blowtorched off, collected into a coffee can and reconstructed with play-doh. Just because the kid left the school doesn't mean you can go off taking his personality. You're just another one of his mindless drones. If you're trying to be him, then I hate to break it to you, but you're never going to be like him. You can pretend all you want. Do you like to watch people suffer? Do you laugh because inside you know that you caused it? Well, if you do, all I gotta prescribe is some Zoloft. They prescribe it to crazy people all the time. You have the creepy serial killer face. The next time I see you, I'll personally fix that. Besides, I am going to be a doctor, might as well practice now. ---- TOP OF PAGE
7:09 PM
run run run ![]() You've probably already heard me say this, but I'm actually really good at it I realized. I'm excited because it's something I don't expect to be good at. But I me. XD You know, I'm actually excited to learn mannequin posing. Like you know, you pose aguess I am, lol, I just need to get some new shoes since the rubber grips at the bottom do no favors. So most of the other models are friendly, all but one anyway, she seems kinda bitchy. You know, she just does. I gotta say I'm really excited, just kinda exhausted. You know, its just naturally s a mannequin in a window front. I don't know, it just seems like the coolest thing ever, but I think I'd break and start cracking up. But that's all that's new. I finally cleaned my fish's bowl after I've been neglecting to clean it. I mean, it was reddish now because of his food. Man, I'm such a bad owner. Everything seems to be going by so fast, I mean it's only the 25th. Yay, my month anniversary with my fish is coming up! It's amazing I've kept it alive for so long. He's gotten really big too. Well, at least to me. Well, as you can probably tell, school's just been school. You know, I have an essay to do on who I want to become president. I find this needless and stupid. Why does my English teacher even care? Besides I hate essays. I'm not going to trouble you about who I favor. Personally, I like both, but both candidates have views that I disagree with. So I favor one more than the other, but you can tell by my personality who I would like to win. So I finally figured out what I would do my essay for World Reg on. It's gonna be about Korean family structures. Lol, it took me long enough didn't it? Well, I'm just picky! The cast list comes up tomorrow and I'm excited-ish. Yeah, XD ---- TOP OF PAGE
Tuesday, September 23, 20089:48 PM
so so tired I've gotta admit, lately I've been quite tired lately, and I'm not sure of why. Maybe I'm expending all my energy and stretching myself out too thin. Last night were the auditions to the musical. I thought I had a good chance of getting a call back because when I sang my song everyone smiled and enjoyed it. But imagine my disappointment when I didn't see my name on the callbacks list posted in the cafe this morning. It wasn't like I was gonna bawl my eyes out or anything, but I actually thought I'd get one. I dunno, I guess I got my hopes to high or something. But whatever. My friend was there and his name wasn't on the list either, but he was trying in vain to say that it wasn't a big deal, we were still in the company such and such etc. I know he was probably saying it all for himself, but I kinda thought I'd get a somewhat good part. You walked into my classroom today and visited the teacher. I couldn't help but feel repulse for you since I comepletely lost all respect for you since you're such an immature child. Besides, I don't exsist to you anyway. ![]() I didn't want the whole modelling thing to get out in the open. That's why I was silently seething on the inside when one of my personal confidants decided to spill the news to people the morning after. I didn't want people to know, and I didn't want to make it such a big deal. I don't want to be judged like 'oh, she's not pretty' or 'she's only doing this because -insert something completely untrue here-'. I just don't want drama, because words gets around, and I end up not getting a job and only embarassing myself. Girls talk. I've only really told a few people about the model thing. I didn't want to make it such a big deal. I'm keeping it under wraps, as long as a few people could keep their mouths shut. You know, it's my dream to be on one of those big H&M ads in the mall. You know, no mannequinns, just you and a white wall. That would be amazing. But I really doubt that would happen. If I made it onto an ad and someone recognized me, I'd own up to it. I don't want to brag about this model thing because it's no big deal. But I can certainly tell you others would brag all the way to the sun and back if given teh chance. ---- TOP OF PAGE
3:26 PM
You're silly ![]() I thought it was cute how you tried to flirt with my horribly today, but I have to thank you for offering to help me with my chem. You put your arm on my desk, leaning over me in a 'cool guy' pose and watched me do my homework. I gotta say it was cute, but definately not your thing. I mean, you're so not jockish XD I mean really, I watched you cry in the second grade when you didn't know what page we were on. I thought it was weird then, overemotional before, and sensitive today. I'm like 'aww'. I don't want to bring up the daily crying incidents from teh second grade, they might embarass you. But when I told you I had everything under control since the work was pretty easy, you kinda got shy again and ran away. I kinda felt bad, I should've let you help me even though I really didn't need it. Here, lemme give you a smile. I can tell you that I had a crush on you a long time ago, furing my obsessed Aaron Carter fangirl days. Lol, he was so cute and amazing back then. I think he might be homo now, lol. You haven't changed. You still look exactly the same. It's cute that you're shy, I just wish you were a little bit more confident :] ---- TOP OF PAGE
Monday, September 22, 200810:39 PM
transferee ![]() I usually don't hate anyone. Well, that was totally and comepletely BS, because I greatly dislike you. Just because you're here doesn't make you better than anybody else. There's nothing special about you. All you are is fake. You're another stupid plastic Barbie that can't walk or talk on their own. One that has to change their personality all the time so it is possible that everyone likes them. Sure, you could be a hated bitch, but you want to be the one everyone loves. And when you do find out someone dislikes you, you go about and try to change it. You act as if you know everything, well I hate to break it to you, but you're nothing special. I hope you get beaten out of Harvard by some asian kid. [Go asians!] Sure you're head of this, and head of this, but it's not like you're making a difference. You sit there and do nothing. You don't contribute, you just get to play the role of 'snotty-nosed biotch'. But whatever. You seem like a great person, but you're nothing more than a shallow puddle. I don't need to waste anymore of my time on you either. ------ If you don't know me in real life, you probably don't know that I'm psychopathic college obsessed. maybe it's the fact that my rents drilled it into me when I was six, but hey that's me. Meh. I've only been buying Seventeen magazine and Cosmo Girl becuase there's a mention of colleges on the cover. Personally, I wouldn't really pick it up. But if it's about college, I'll spend $2.99 for it in the supermarket. I definately want to go to a college or university in New York. Manhattanville, Rochester, Syracuse, Adelphi are all on my lists. If not, I'll go to Massachusetts. But I definately want to stay up on the East Coast. Personally, I feel like there would be nothing going for me on the other side of the country. It's nothing against them, but I like me East Coast-ness. ------------ Awwww. Crap. Tomorrow's the mile run, I'm outta shape, and thank god I bulked up on carbs during that nasty spaghetti. Thank god I couldn't taste anything. Wish me luck. ---- TOP OF PAGE
10:06 PM
wow, this is odd ![]() I can truthfully say that up until today, I hadn't missed you at all. Actually, if we went deeper I could tell you that I could care less if you jumped off of the Brooklyn Bridge and onto a thick sheet of ice, cracking your skull on impact, as all that was in your mind spilled out in a pool of red. I've gotta tell you the truth and gotta say that I might've laughed because I expected something like that from you. [I only ask for forgiveness about that image I just placed in your head] But there was something about today. I don't know why, but I wanted you to throw your arms around me and go 'I miss you'. It'd be nice, but I know I can live without you. Besides, all you ever did was screw me over and mess everything up for me. But you know, there are those days where I feel like I need you. No, you don't have the satisfaction that I think about you. Really I don't bother wasting my breath or my gray matter. But whenever I see specific motifs, then I'll think of you. I don't look at you, nor do I talk to you. I'm glad. Maybe I'll give you a hug next time I see you. Or not. The touch of your skin might melt my flesh anyway. ---- TOP OF PAGE
Wednesday, September 17, 20083:32 PM
grow up ![]() So I'm guessing that since you're reading this, you probably know of all the controversy about the fall play. Yes, I know about it, and I have to say it's bugging the crap out of me. Okay, yes I know that many seniors are upset because they didn't get lead roles, but didn't they even think that the Drama instructor is saving major roles in the musical for them? [since the musical is being casted next week even though its a year away] Umm, hello? Sure you're good actors, but didn't you realize that the musical is much more important? I'm not trying to say that the fall drama is crap, no, it's amazing. I'm just saying to the eyes of many that the spring musical is much MUCH more important. Blech, people should stop creating so much random drama. Yes, you didn't get the best part, but a part is still a part. You still play a big role in keeping the story together. But just watch, all the upperclassmen will be racking in ALL the good parts in the musical. We all were talking about this before all the drama happened. Us sophs were gonna try out because we were gonna get better parts in the play because all the really amazing people were to get all the good parts in our musical. Everyone was perfectly fine with that then. And now? People are flipping shits. Lol, makes me think of monkeys throwing feces at the zoo. Don't ask, I'm random. ---- TOP OF PAGE
2:58 PM
peppermint ice cream ![]() Today is the first day in which they release the exclusive, and limited peppermint ice cream! Definately my favorite. I wait all year for it. The first thing I did once I got out of school was run out and grab myself a carton. Since the whole economy thing, the tubs have gotten much smaller. They used to be 2 gallon containers. They probably don't even hold one gallon now, and the price even rose. It's kinda depressing I have to admit. So today I managed to drag one of my friends out of homeroom to come with me to World Cultures club. It was great. Well, the meeting itself is kinda boring, but it was cool. We have a trip already planned. And my old English teacher volunteered me to do a poster for the trip, but the thing is, I didn't want to. Sure I love her, but I really don't want to be bothered with making a poster for some random trip around the town. I mean, I don't want to go. I'll probably get shot lol. JK. Other than that, the day was monotonous. You know, the boring usual stuff. I'm nervous because I have a chem test on Tuesday, and I need to find a new song for my musical audition. XP Any suggestions? ---- TOP OF PAGE
Sunday, September 14, 200811:05 PM
I told you ![]() I told you. I told you many many times, but why didn't you listen. I told you not to look; you looked. I told you not to speak; you spoke. I told you to run away; you stood still. Are you that ignorant to realize that what you see before you is a beast? It catches you in it's decieving gaze and begins to eat you, heart and soul before you even realize what happened. Can't you see the blood dripping forth from its gaping mouth. It's staring you down. Close your eyes! Turn away! Goddammit, I told you to close your eyes! Listen to me you fool. Can't you see that all you are is the next meal? It only wants you because you're the first thing it laid it's eyes on once it realized that it was hungry. Listen to me. I'm the only one that can really save you. ---- TOP OF PAGE
10:31 PM
Moronic Society ![]() I don't know why, but I'm depressed. I was watching one of my friend's youtube videos and I don't know. I just realized that we are one of the most moronic societies of the world. Don't get me wrong, I freakin love America. I just hate how everyone is blowing this election out of porportion. Yes, I know that were in a bad time, but i dout that either canidate can do shit about our issues. They don't even care about the issues anymore. They only care about pigs and lipstick. I mean really? I mean, just listening to MJ's outlook is kinda depressing. He reminds me of my cynical best friend sometimes, but I always love how he looks at things. He's quite and interesting person to listen too. [if you have eleven minutes to blow then watch it here] I honestly recommend that you watch the video so you know what I'm talking about. Society makes me sad. TT^TT ---- TOP OF PAGE
10:11 PM
Mall trip ![]() Fact: I think I'm becoming a shop-aholic Today I spent the day searching for someone to go to the mall with since I didn't want to be chaperoning my sisters and their friends alone. So my second choice turned out to be availble. I hadn't seen her in a very long time. Almost two years to be exact and I was really looking forward to seeing her again. She was one of my closest friends, and I was really overjoyed to be able to see her again since we go to different schools. Nothing had really changed about her. She just got taller than me. But she was still awesome. We kinda lurked around, buying stuff, stalking people, and in the end we watched House Bunny. It was like how it always used to be. I have to say it was a cute movie, but she and I decided to leave ten/fifteen minutes because we wanted to do some last minute fifteen minutes before the mall closed shopping. I bought four sweaters, and legwarmers to wear over my socks! Yay! :] It was really nice to catch up. I saw these slutty chicks [I say chicks because they don't deserve a higher word] coming out of Hot Topic with rabbit ears and bunny tails that they had just bought, and they seriously looked like 6th grades sluts. I mean, I totally would want the tail because it was one of the most adorable things I have ever seen, but the ears? Um, no. What's coming to the world nowadays? ---- TOP OF PAGE
9:58 PM
You're pregnant? ![]() Honestly, I don't want to be mean, but I didn't really expect this of you. I kinda hoped this thing would happen to you. You know as karma. You never really did 'horrible' things to me, but still, you're only a sophmore in high school. How did you let this happen? You know you ruined your whole future because you know are 'engaged' to this kid. I don't have much to say but to scold you. When I heard, I was kinda shocked, because you didn't seem like the kid that would get caught up in all this crap. But look where you are now. You're fifteen. Pregnant. You're getting married. Well, I'm at a loss for words really. I never really 'knew' you persay. But I knew enough about you. And get this, your fiancee is a freshman in college and ou still persist and try to reel in the incoming freshman at your own highschool. Haven't you done enough damage to yourself? You don't know me anymore, so don't take any advice or heed any of my warnings. All I can really say is 'Congrats' and 'Good luck'. ---- TOP OF PAGE
Saturday, September 13, 200812:53 PM
Library ![]() Well, what I can only really say is that there are certainly an abundance of freaks here today. No not nerds. Just quite simply in fact freaks. Like this one and that one over there. Certainly you cannot see tham, but thenk god for you. The sight is quite an eyesore. They are those girls everyone hates. You know, the one's that wear teh Victoria's Secret sweatpants out in public thinking that they are most certainly in fact the most outrageously great thing int he world since sliced bread. Certainly I don't hate sliced bread. I like it, but you know, unsliced bread is just as good at times. You know, the freaks. The blonde dipshits that think theyre amazing and everyone loves them. I wonder why they're even here. I mean, go on myspace at your own place because the public library is not the place for you to post your half nude photos you took last night during a drunken 6th grader party. They were trying to go on Myspace, and the computers started to freeze up because of it. Maybe they are freezing for a reason you slut. Next time put on a shirt before you come to the library. Bette yet, get some new 'acceptable' pants and a new face while your at it. Hey, that's just mean, but whatever. These people don't belong in the library. So I'm here researching for books for my World Regionals essay that's due in a month. I was going to do it on Vietnamese superstitions, but the library has next to none books on it. Really they have tons and tons of books about the war, but not on the culture or country itself. So I went on to Japan. Mainly supertitons and such, but none really. So I changed my topic on it to social customs and history. And sure enough they had a lot. I mangaed to take out 17 books from the shelves, but mainly I kinda wanted to do geishas. No books on that, so I setteled for the cultural samurai. Then I changed my mind because Japan is wayy to predictable for me, and I heard a lot of people would be doing it since it's so freaking [u]ah-mazing[/u]. Note my sarcasm. So then I switched to China, I toook out 23 books, and changed my mind again. So at the moment, I'm currently between two other countries at the moment, but I won't tell you. You might steal my idea. XD So I've been here for two hours, mangaged to take out 30 books, and put them all back in order with the Dewey Decimal system. SO, I'm bored, adn my parents won't pick me up. Oh well, I guess I'll read a book. ---- TOP OF PAGE
10:58 AM
Flirt ![]() Why did you tell me this? How is this relevant to anything you ever said? You told me I flirt, and how is it that I do this? You told me that I'm a big flirt, and I flirt with every guy I see, and how is this so? Do I purposely grab and hold their arm, dragging them towards me? Do I lean in and pout my lips? Do I get really close? You should shut up, because you don't know me. I'm not attracted to every guy out there, and I'm certainly not to you. So you should cut the crap and realize that you don't mean anything to me. If you want to have the satisfaction knowing that I hate you, then there you go. Did that just make your day? If I had a crush on a guy, it's not like I'd let them know. You may think this, but I've changed. I won't do anything about it. I'll just wait and let the crush subside, because tomorrow I won't like him anymore. It was just a moment. If you're lucky, I'll think about you for a few days, and then realize there's something wrong with you and move on. Just to let you know, I'm picky. And I can most certainly tell you that you most definately a spoil fruit in which no would care to buy. ---- TOP OF PAGE
10:43 AM
Touchy lately ![]() Is it just me, or am I noticing this. What's with you telling me to wash my face, but you intentionally feel the need to rub my cheeks and point out my imperfections? I'm pretty sure that people are not supposed to touch their faces due to the natual oils and dirt upon their fingers. Are you trying to make up for lost time? Because if you are, I'd rather have a shopping spree in SoHo then have you pinch my ears. It's nothing against you. You just haven't been working up to par. Filling my life that is. But back onto the main scene. Don't tug on my ears because I fear they may stretch and droop onto the ground. Don't pinch my cheeks because I don't want wrinkles when I'm twenty. Don't jab me with your finger because I may dent, and I'm pretty sure where we live there isn't a body shop in close proximity. If you want to show 'affection' get me some gingerbread cookies, or take me somewhere fun. Spend some time with me and don't decide to ruin it by randomly bursting at the seams with something I had done. I know my place, and I know my job. I don't need to be reminded with a jab. ---- TOP OF PAGE
Friday, September 12, 20085:55 PM
If he says hes got beef that I'm a vegetarian ![]() Yesh, if he does, tell him that for me. Lol, it's just a line from one of my new favorite songs. It's called Don't Trust Me. There's a curse or two, and it's techno-y like Hellogoodbye, and it's by 3 oh! 3. [here] I heard it on one of those radio channels that come with IO and Directv and I loved it. [the dance music channel is 568 i think for Directv and 818 for IO] So what is new with me? Nothing really. I was doing a pedicure today, and I was in a foul mood, but the little girl told me I looked really pretty in my outfit. You guys have seen it today, you know the plaid one. And immediately, I warmed up too her. I have to admit that I have my own unique style and I love it. People tell me they love my outfits everyday. And that brings a smile to my face. I'm not vain or anything, it's just a confidence boost. Because when I was younger and in public school, I was a horrible dresser and people made fun of the way I looked becuase I didn't have style. But now, fashion means a lot to me. It's my dream to be a designer, but you guys already know this. I want to be a fashion icon, where people look up to me. But the thing is, I don't like telling people where I get my clothes, and copying my style. Lol. That's all for now? ---- TOP OF PAGE
5:26 PM
Rain Rain ![]() As you've probably all heard from all of my friends, it's raining here. I love the rain, everything's just washed away and it's all clean. And it smells amazing. Just take the time, and open the window one day after it rains, and take a deep breath. I remember a book I read. It was an interesting one, maybe one day I'll tell you the title so you can read it yourself. But in this novel, there was a scene after a shotgun wedding where the man was talking to his wife. I think his name was David, but I don't remember. So he was upset because the LaRue family had forced him into a shotgun wedding to their daughter because they thought they were sleeping with one another. So he asked her how she smelled so good. And she told him she washed it with rainwater that was caught in a barrel. And so, he goes and buys her a brand new barrel to catch water for her. And she's overcome because she has never really received anything. I thought it was really cute. My last post was something random that was on my mind. It's written in a 'prose' style. Its about love if you didn't get that, and I talked to my best friend about it. I would like to be married yes. To a nice man, and maybe have some kids. With my luck and I can't really be sure, but pshycics seem to tell me otherwise. I'm to be married and have three children, two boys and one girl. I don't know how this is, but whenever I go, they seem to tell me exactly the same thing. It'd be nice. I want to live in a nice Tudour house with a pretty yard in a nice neighborhood. A gated community? Maybe, if I ever make that much. I want a dog or two, and a pet tortise that would eventually get so big, he could roam aroun in the backward graden eating my lilies. A koi pond too! Lol, now I'm just getting a little ahead of myself. I hope I'd have a good relationship with my kids. But I'd have to really love me husband, and I hope he'd really love me. But you know, I have this feeling that he would leave me. I dunno. It's just a feeling. My friends and I joke about it all the time, but you know I worry. Maybe I might possibly adopt children. I dunno if I'd be able to go through childbirth. Maybe I'll adopt a Nigerian/Ugandan boy. And train him to be a runner in the Olympics and win gold. No, I'm just kidding. I dunno. I think those children deserve another chance since they live in such a poverty stricken country, and if I could just save one life... And maybe a daughter from China or a son. But I'd have more of a daughter since they throw daughters into rivers. It's depressing no? And then maybe I'd have her do gymnastics and go to the Olympics too. But I'm kidding. I wouldn't force my child to do anything. I'm not gonna become another Jollie-Pitt phsyco though. I wouldn't have that many children.
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3:49 PM
To speak of love ![]() To speak of love is to speak of sin. Love does not mean 'love' anymore. It means a 'great attraction to'. We as a whole don't fall in 'love' anymore. At least not with other beings. No, we love material objects, most commonly 'money' or 'fame'. These said things can be found in the most simplest of places. But such, it's all in the matter of obtaining it. There have been stories of people who wasted away in the pursuit of money and fame. I can say, I have not yet met one of the kind. But I can surely tell you that I shall one day soon. For this world is overpopulated in the kind. Those who care about the true meaning of that four letter word, such as I have become a minority. Almost completely wiped out, extinct. I would love to say there was some organization out there protecting us from our expulsion, but truely I cannot. The closest thing we have to a 'natual wildlife reserve' are online dating sites such as eHarmony and Match. And how are we supposed to 'fall' in love? Is there some sort of skydiving operation that has us jump out of planes, thousands of feet in the air into a pool shaped into a heart? Well, I shall not be taking one of those. One, I'm afraid of heights, and two, I can't swim. I would probably drown in this pool of 'love'. But you know, there could possibly be a gorgeous lifeguard to fish me out. But then again, there aren't that many gorgeous lifeguards out there. So would you like to join me in an attempt to convince the Wildlife Foundation of Zoos and Aquariums to have us put in the books as 'endangered'? Who knows, if it works, I'll be waving at you from behind a plexiglass wall at the Bronx Zoo. ---- TOP OF PAGE
3:28 PM
Manners manners manners ![]() As usual, I was taking one of my best friends home today, and I was hanging out with one of my other best friends out in the courtyard. And beside him was this freshman. Yes, I said it, a freshman. So there she was, all emoish with her friend, and they were talking as my group of friends were talking. The girl just seemed creepy to me. So I saw her bag and said, "I like your bag". She just gave me this look and was like 'okay'... She didn't really respond all too well. Truthfully, I didn't really even like it, it was like most other bags that I've seen and I only said it to be nice. And what a bitch. I don't know her enough to call her that yes, but when someone compliments you on something you're supposed to say 'thank you'. I mean, haven't your parents taught you anything? And as a response to my english honors journal, yes, I do think our country is becoming a moronic society, and it's in part of people like her. I'm not accusing her parental figures of doing a bad job, she just needs to learn some respect. Especial when its an upperclassman you're dealing with. I don't hate freshman. No. Generally, I know quite a few of them, and I like most of them. I even get hugs in the hall everyday. I try to be nice to them. I mean, I was a freshman too, and i help them when their lost. I feel pity for some of them. Like that boy who sits all alone after school on the bench outside waiting for his ride. He's cute too XD And then there's this small African American boy. He seems like a sweet kid. He's short, and has big 'Egyptian eyes' like a cat. I never really see him with anyone, so I kinda feel bad for him. Maybe I'll say hello or send him a smile one day. I've made a few new freshman aquaintances. Really only becuase I wanted to be nice because they were there at the drama auditions/meeting. But that's all for now. I advise that if you ever have children, you should teach them manners the day they open their mouths. ---- TOP OF PAGE
Wednesday, September 10, 200810:37 PM
Jude law ![]() Yes, it is true. He is no longer dapper and and dazzeling. You can see these pictures here. It's sad isn't it. I have to admit, there were at time I swooned over this man. For his acting was amazing, and his face was jaw-dropping. But maybe I sound shallow, but I'm not. He's just gotten older, and I wanted to ruin the dreams of hundreds of girls out there. Zac Efron, well, that's a totally different story. I'm just kidding. I'm not gonna talk about Zac. He's not even that good looking. I don't know why you all care that much about him. He's not that good of an actor, and his HIgh School Musical movies are horendous. I totally love Matt Damon at this moment for what he's saying about Palin. Check out the vid here. "The 37-year-old actor compares her possibility of being President to a ‘really bad Disney movie’. Ouch! Damon shared, “I think there’s a really good chance Sarah Palin could become president, and I think that’s a really scary thing… I don’t know anything about her and in eight weeks, I don’t think I’m going to know anything about her. I know that she was a mayor of a really, really small town and she’s the governor for Alaska for less than two years. I just don’t understand. I think the pick was made for political purposes… Do the actuary tables and there’s a one out of three chance, if not more, that [John] McCain doesn’t survive his first term and it’ll be President Palin… It’s like a really bad Disney movie. The hockey mom, you know, ‘oh, I’m just a hockey mom’… and she’s facing down Vladimir Putin (of Russia)… It’s totally absurd… it’s a really terrifying possibility.”" It kinda grossed me out when Chace Crawford of Gossip Girls said she was hot. I mean, wtf. She's old, she knows shit about our government, and she's botoxed. Well, I think she's botoxed anyway. I don't like her. She has no experience, and comes from a state so disconnected from teh rest of America. It's nothing against her or anything, I'm sure she's a good person. Not a good mother though. Apparently she didn't give her daughter the 'talk' and her 17 year old is now having a baby. What a bad image to give our already tainted image to the world. Argh. Those are my views at the moment. I have much more to say about Palin, just to tired to verbally attack her from thousands of miles away at the moment. ---- TOP OF PAGE
9:46 PM
Goodnight and goodbye ![]() So after a trip shopping with the family, [I only managed to grab a white sweater, two tee shirts, and a fleece pullover] we stopped by the grocery store to pick up a few things. As my mother went wit one of my sisters in, my dad, my younger sister and I ran across the street to Blockbusters. As always I was greeted by my bud Andrew. Yes, I made friends with the people that work there since I'm there almost twice sometimes everyday. We quickly pulled some DVDs off the shelves. I still remember Blockbuster when all they had was VHS. I went up to the check out and had my conversation with Andrew. It turns out he'll only be working there for a few more weeks before he moves away. I mean why? I got so sad! I'm gonna have to make new friends. O.o I don't think I can do that at Blockbusters since the newer people they hired are 'slow'. I'm losing my best gay friend! Thus I am depressed. I mean, every girl wants a best gay guy friend. And I'm losing mine!!!!11!! [note the ones are there for effect] I need a new one. But Andrew! Lol, he just like graduated from the high school a few years ago I think. But truthfully, I am pretty sad. He seemed happy though, so I guess I should be happy for him. It just kinda sucks having it dumped randomly on you. ---- TOP OF PAGE
2:15 PM
I'm dating someone? ![]() Well, it's new news if you guys haven't heard it yet. Actually, I'm not. Everyone's been asking me lately if I'm dating on of my guy friends. Umm, I don't know how this seems so. Besides, we don't touch? Lol, I have a problem when some people touch me. But that's just me. So no. I'm not dating him or anyone. I've had my eye on a few, but it means on no way that I shall be pursuing any of aforementioned men. I've heard one had a crush on me before, but it doesn't mean that he can't fall for me again right? Lol, in my dreams probably. But I have a tendency to get bored. You guys know me. I get frustrated and 'hate' the person. Heh, whoever ever decides to marry or date me better be aware. Dude, I don't even know what that means, but whatever. So I'm having open calls for the role of my new sweetheart. Anyone interested? ---- TOP OF PAGE
Tuesday, September 9, 200810:49 PM
Knowing you ![]() I've known you for a while, but is it just me, or is it that I'm a walking encyclopedia about you, and yet you never made a point to find out my favorite color. You didn't need to ask, you figured it out through the color of my backpack. Did you notice that whenever we talked I asked you questions about yourself? What's your favorite movie? What's your favorite color? Do you have any pets? What do you like to do? DId you ever think that whenever I asked you those questions, half because I wanted to know more about you, but mainly I wanted you to ask me what my favorite movie, color, my pets, and what I liked to do in return. You never caught on. You were to mindless and slow, so I had to do it for you. "Oh, that's cool. My favorite color is blue." This was probably why I knew so much about you, and when you didn't even remember my birthday, lest my last name. Do you really know anything about me at all? Well, let me catch you up on a few things.
Well, if you didn't get the point lemme put it clearly. I HATE YOU.
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10:35 PM
School tires me ![]() You probably have all heard this, but it's true. Or well, I'm not exactly sure, but I've been very tired lately. Sunday there was a Women's Expo at the convention center and I went with my mother thinking 'why not?'. I had to admit it was fun. Well more interesting. Kinda. I had my fortune read, and I wasn't very happy with the result. The woman just kept beating around the bush. I didn't get much out of 20 minutes. She told me disappointing things yes, but I shall prove her wrong. The only thing interesting was what my 'husband' would be like. He'd be very practical, and would actually do what he needed to do rather than procrastinate. He'd be friendly, outgoing, and ambitious. He'd respect my intelligence, and would be okay with the fact that I had a better job than he. Lol, you know men. They don't like to be shown up by their wives. The perfect man? Probably. But you know. Billions of people in the world, I'll probably never find him. I'll probably end up marrying a guy who I know isn't the one, but he'll be 'close enough'. But on to our main topic. For some reason, I've been completely drained lately. So very tired yes. LIke today I almost fell asleep in Chemistry. I know, it's pretty sad. I don't know why it is. Maybe it's just me. Other than that, that's it for now? ---- |
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